Child Development 101: Baby-led Development, Getting Out of Your Own Way in Parenting

Hungarian early childhood expert and RIE co-founder Magda Gerber coined the phrase ‘educarer,' emphasizing that parents and other caregivers naturally have a combined role in educating and caring for children. The RIE Method revolves around treating infants and children with the same respect we would show another adult.

"You can support a child's psychological well-being if you let them feel they are in control of themselves," says Ruth Anne Hammond, faculty member at Pacific Oaks College and Children's School and Certified RIE Associate. "Self-esteem, self-respect and self-confidence happen when a child feels safe and comfortable."

Hammond describes the three primary RIE tenets that contribute to a child's feelings of safety and comfort: Free movement and free play; attentive care giving and respect and authenticity.

Unstructured, uninterrupted play allows a child to be an innovator, an explorer and a self-learner. Hammond considers a low-key play date between a parent or caregiver and their child of great benefit if the parent is fully "tuned in" with the child and allows the child to lead the play.

Tuning in with a child applies even during everyday tasks such as feeding and changing diapers, which ties into the principle of attentive care giving. Hammond maintains that engaging with the child during a bath or a diaper change gives the child the sense that "something is being done with them, not to them."

We looked at the idea of respect in care giving in the example of the mother, the child and the orange slice. In a similar vein, authenticity means being honest with oneself and a child. If a child falls and begins crying, don't dismiss the emotion and tell them they're fine. As Hammond says, "Allowing the child to live with her own reaction to things helps her learn to trust her own feelings."

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